Missouri Police Chief Admits Citizen Journalists Keep Cops Honest

As I’m sure most of you know, there has been a bit of a situation in Ferguson, MO. The killing of unarmed citizens by police, the presence of protesters, the true arrival of the police industrial complex, the accidental shooting of protesters and vitriolic displays by what seem to be mentally unstable police officers.

But just like every black hole emits Hawking Radiation, there is some good emanating from the situation in Ferguson. In fact, I believe we’ve been given the strategy to defeat psychopathic cops by one of their own. More on that later…

To start off the good news, three of these potentially psychopathic cops have either retired, been suspended or fired after displaying tendencies towards violence and mass murder.

Credit to GadflyWrites for the Image
“Where is a Muslim with a back pack when you need them.” -Matthew Pappert courtesy of Facebook

Let’s start with ex-officer from Glendale, Matthew Pappert. He was caught on Facebook posting that the protesters should have been put down like dogs and lamented at the lack of a Muslim back-pack bomber to do the job. Now I can see why he doesn’t like protesters, because I’d have to guess there have been numerous gatherings protesting his gold-douche-chill fedora shown on the right. What I can’t see is how a guy who claims to have gone to Harvard has such a hard time with subject-verb agreement in his Facebook posts. Regardless, he’s been fired, much to the delight of the sane. Score one for Facebook and the Daily Caller who preserved the Facebook posts.

Next up is Sgt. Major Dan Page. He was found to be just a wee bit racist and homophobic in a speech he gave to the Oathkeepers in 2012. But that’s not what got him fired according to St. Louis County Police Chief Jon Belmar. He also, in that video, makes the following statements:

“I’m real good with a rifle. My best shot is at 1,875 meters. I got me a gold star on that one. That’s a fact. You run from me you will die tired. I’m dead serious, folks.”

Picture courtesy of www.kmbc.com
“I’m into diversity. I kill everybody, I don’t care,” Sgt. Major Dan Page

“I personally believe in Jesus Christ as my lord savior, but I’m also a killer. I’ve killed a lot. And if I need to, I’ll kill a whole bunch more. If you don’t want to get killed, don’t show up in front of me, it’s that simple.”

This last one is my favorite. Usually racist people will say something like “I’m not racist, but…” Well Dan Page uses the original and groundbreaking phrase, “I’m into diversity. I kill everybody, I don’t care,” to show just how un-racist he is. Way to push the envelope Dan! So far he has been suspended pending an internal affairs review. Score one for YouTube and massive stupidity.

Finally we have Ray Albers, AKA Officer “Go F@ck Yourself.”  This mentally unstable mega-jerk is such a massive sissy that… well, just watch the video for yourself if you haven’t already seen it.

It’s pretty self-explanatory why Officer Go F@ck Yourself was forced to resign. But the man who had to force his retirement seemed to think differently about it. St. Ann Police Chief Aaron Jimenez claimed that shots were fired and someone had a gun, prompting Albers to raise his. So he was forced to resign for swearing, not pointing a gun recklessly at unarmed people.

This is Officer Go F@ck Yourself
This is Officer Go F@ck Yourself

I’m just gonna go out on a limb and say this story of shots being fired is probably nothing more than a typical incestuous, inner-department-cock-block-of-the-truth type situation. When it comes to the police’s word against a guy with a camera, I’ll take the guy with the camera… Maybe even if he forgot his batteries. The fact is, on the video there is no evidence whatsoever that shots were fired behind the cameramen and at no time did Albers say, “put the gun down.” He had plenty of time to say, “I’ll f@cking kill you” to the folks with the camera, though.

“…citizen journalists, who were sitting with cameras recording, waiting for something stupid to happen, which they got. They won on this one.” -St. Ann Police Chief Aaron Jimenez

But Jimenez did make one statement that offers a solution to our psycho-cop problem, as I mentioned earlier. Jimenez explained, there were “a whole bunch of what you’d call citizen journalists, who were sitting with cameras recording, waiting for something stupid to happen, which they got. They won on this one.” So there you have it; score one for Citizen Journalists.

I think we have our strategy for getting the psychopaths out of our police forces, since it seems as though the “good cops” that we always hear exist are unable to bring themselves to do the right thing and expose them for us. What we need are MORE CITIZENS FILMING POLICE. We need a damn coparazzi following these ticking time-bombs at every turn. Ferguson Police have started wearing body cameras, but don’t you for a second think that will ever be enough. Just like the Ferguson Police defied procedures and neglected to file an incident report for the shooting of Brown, they can flick a switch and turn their cameras off. These cameras will more than likely be mostly used to exonerate police officers, but they will be mysteriously off when there is something more nefarious afoot.

So if something is going down, grab your camera or phone and hit record. Remember to be civil, because that’s what this is all about. Let’s keep these cops honest and expose the psychos. Let’s make Police Chief Jimenez proud!

-Tooze James


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